ah. the phone finally rang.
yes, it was the voice that i have been dying to hear since three days ago. like usual, he’s talking in the calm and collected way .. we talked over few unimportant things. over the songs. over the stories of the last day of the event. basically nothing.
i was dying to talk about what happened earlier this week.
dying to tell him that i can’t stop thinking about him since we kissed.
i can’t stop, even when i was practically kissing someone else only hours after that.
it might be the way he kissed. it might be the way he held me close as if he didn’t want to let me go. it might be the release we felt, after holding up for a year or so.
but no, i didn’t have that courage. i stayed quiet.
then he hung up.
he’s home. his wife and children are waiting.
ah. why should i be falling all over again like this? i thought i’ve gotten over this.
like i said to him months ago,
we, together
he’s got nothing to lose,
while i’ve got everything to lose.
i miss him, terribly.
